Toilet Training / FAQ

Below are some common questions parents ask about toilet training + some common challenges.  You can go to our "Toilet Training Checklist” is a great way to tick off the necessary tools to make sure you are ready.  If you are prepared you can be more effective and move through the process quicker.

 

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

1.0  ABOUT TOILET TRAINING

  1. When is my child ready to start toilet training?
  2. How long will it take to toilet train my child?
  3. How can I understand my child better?
  4. Is it easier to toilet train an infant (under 12 months) or a toddler?
  5. What are the benefits of having my child out of nappies early?
  6. Should I use a potty or the toilet?
  7. Do you recommend using nappies and pull-ups when toilet training?
  8. Do I sit or stand my boy?
  9. Can I get these products through my Daycare Centre?
  10. Do you offer any guarantees with your products?

 

2.0  COMMON TOILET TRAINING CHALLENGES

  1. My child only wees on the toilet, but refuses to poo.  She only wants to poo in her nappy and often runs away and hides.  What can I do? 
  2. My child was fully toilet trained but is now wetting his pants again. Why is this happening?
  3. My child is refusing to go to the toilet, how can I encourage her to go?
  4. My child keeps stopping and starting. Sometimes he will go on the toilet and then he will have accidents or refuse to go.  How can I keep him going consistently?
  5. How do I get my child to tell me she needs to go to the toilet before she has an accident?
  6. My child has been toilet trained during the day for a year now but is still wetting the bed at nights.  What do you recommend for bedwetting?

 

1.0  ABOUT TOILET TRAINING

 

1.  When is my child ready to start toilet training?

This is a commonly asked question with the commonly answered response being “most children are not ready to control their poo and wee (bowels and bladder) until they are two years old and some not until they are three”.  This coincides with the highly recommended,  “wait until your child is ready” scenario.  It is up to parents to find the full facts instead of just accepting these common answers.   We need to seriously evaluate the consequences of keeping our children in nappies longer than what we have to.  Whatever angle you look at, whether it be your child’s comfort, hygiene, finances or the environment, it just doesn’t make sense.  And the seriousness of each of those scenarios is worth re-evaluating the “normal” recommendations.

We often just accept that the “readiness theory” for toilet training, yet would we ever dream of applying the same principle to any other area of our child’s life.  Is a two year old capable of knowing when they are ready to eat vegetables, go to bed at a reasonable hour, use manners and other social graces that are required to rear well-adjusted healthy children?  If we don’t let our children make these sorts of decisions in all other areas of their life, why then would we consider it for just toilet training?  How do they know?  What books have they read?  What analysis have they done?  If you think about it, a two year olds entire knowledge of toilet training up until this point in their lives is the habit we as parents have created and instilled in them: you go to the toilet in your nappy.  

If you have waited like most parents until after two, some children by this stage are getting uncomfortable with going to the toilet on themselves and let you know by pulling at or removing their dirty nappy, telling you their nappy is wet, and asking not to wear one anymore.  This of course can happen at any age depending on the child.  My sister’s twins were doing this at 14 months.  These are the obvious signs that yes your child is ready, or in reality over ready.  More often than not though, parent’s don’t see these signs in their children, or it is taking longer and longer for them to happen.  A child comfortable in their 2-3 year habit of using a nappy may not want to make the abrupt, hasty transition into the unknown.  They become comfortable in what we have already taught them over their lifetime.  Subsequently, while we are waiting for this time of “readiness”, the bad habits become more and more ingrained; making it harder to break the longer we leave it.  Hence, when we give up waiting and step in at this point, because our child is nearing three and nothing is happening, we encounter all sorts of objections, and conclude, “well maybe they aren’t ready after all I’ll wait a bit longer”, ignoring the situation that they may be just comfortable in their existing habit we have already enforced and have no intention of changing anything.  Yes, but what about being physiologically ready  – being able to control their wees and poos?

My own personal stories blew the status quo recommendations out the window, when it came to toilet training my 2.5 year old and 4 month old.  If I waited until my first child was ready, we would have been waiting a long time.  She was refusing to go to the toilet so therefore she was not ready.  Instead, as soon as I changed my methods and made it fun using the success system with the Go Potty Pack, it took only a matter of days.  She was fully capable, she just didn’t want to.

With my 4 month old, he has had full bowel control since 5 months.  He is able to “hold on” for up to a 10 hour stint at nights as he wakes up dry more often than not now at 10 months.  If he needs to go during the night, he will wake to go.  He is proof that children indeed can control their poo and wee before they are two years old.  My sister’s twin boys were toilet trained by 18 months, nighttime as well.  That’s 185 days short of 2 years or 550 days short of 3 years, the “recommended” time to start toilet training.  Imagine if they had waited an extra 550 days.  This equates to:

  • 6,600 extra nappies they would have used between them and dumped into our environment (conservatively at only 6 nappies each a day),
  • $3,800 extra dollars spent on disposable nappies over this time frame and
  • 13,200 extra hours they would have had to wee and poo on themselves 

Scary numbers when you start to do the math.  This is what my sister has saved by toilet training her twin boys earlier.  And because she started a good habit early, they responded accordingly.

Since starting pottytraining.com.au, though a minority, I am getting parents telling me about their children being toilet trained by 12 months, 11 months crawling to the potty, etc.  Parents it is possible.  And there is enough data to back this up if you are willing to research it.  “Children have enough physical control to begin the potty-training process at three months”.2  

From both a professional and personal opinion, the answer to the question: toilet training is mostly about parents.  The question you need to ask is “Am I ready to start toilet training my child?”   Do I have the emotional and mental capacity at this point to start this process with the right attitude, so I can help my child in a positive and encouraging way to learn something new?  Mopping up accidents and cleaning poo filled pants can take its toll on the best parent.  Choose a week where there will be little distraction, prepare yourself with the right tools, have a game plan, be prepared and go for it!  

 

2.  How long will it take to toilet train my child?

If you do all the right things and know how to work with your child, then toilet training can be completed in days from around 17mths onwards.

Every child is different, with different personalities, capabilities, learning skills, emotional intelligence and so forth.  We as parents are the major factor in how quickly our child learns this new skill.  Our attitude, methods used, consistency, ability to understand and know our child, plays a big part.  This was highlighted with one parent with twins, where one child was toilet trained quite early and the other was not responding to any methods used.  Same methods, two different personalites.  One child the methods worked according to their personality, but clashed with the other with no results.  As parents it is a great advantage to know how to work with each of children with all their differences.  What works for one, may not work for another.

With all these variables though if you follow a guaranteed program, the challenges associated with each child being different, is no longer a problem as you have the right information to adjust your strategy to suit the child.   That is the key to going quickly.  A general approach will give you general results at best.  An approach where you can dedicate the system to suit the child means you can quicken up the process with greater success.  With the right methods some children can pick this up in a matter of days.  We of course do not want to fall into the trap of placing expectations on our child or ourselves though.  This can result in undue pressure whether consciously or subconsciously that can actually cause further delay, just because of our attitude.  Children are smart, they can pick up on our emotional state.  You just need to have patience to keep teaching your child until the habit is formed. 

In saying that, to give you a guideline based on research and real life scenarios, if you start in the "window of opportunity" (18-24mths) that research has proven you will go quicker and have less problems and then combine it with a proven system for success, then here are some real life examples you could also achieve with your child.  If there is a proven system to follow that works, you can definitely adopt the principle - if they can do it, I can too.  You just have to do what they did.  These very happy parents used the Whizz & Plop Go Potty Pack in either Dumpy or Bella themes.

UNDER TWO YEARS OLD

19.5MTH OLD BOY DONE IN 12 DAYS - DAY AND NIGHT!
"Hi, I just really wanted to say a BIG thank-you. My 19 month old son is toilet trained. Daytime and night time in 12 days! I am amazed and SOOOO happy!!..... Anyway, I committed, and lost the nappy at the first signs of his interest. And he 'got it' so quickly. Dry days at childcare, then dry nights with him waking to wee only days later. I'm so proud of him. I wish I had know about this way of toilet training for my daughter who took a good 6 months and was 2 and half by the time we finished. Thanks, Angela"

17MTH OLD BOY - TELLING "POO" AFTER JUST ONE DAY
"I just cannot believe it. I really thought he was too young (17 months) to understand the sticker chart and the whole going to the toilet/potty thing. Man did I underestimate my little guy. We started toilet training yesterday and today we had our first poo in the potty. I am totally gobsamcked that he has that understanding so soon. I filled out the little routine chart yesterday and monitered when he went. I knew around 11am he would have a poo. After going to the toilet several times during the morning and explaining this is where we do poo's and wee's etc......Bang on 11am he looked up at me said "poo" . We grabbed the potty and he happily sat down. We played our little counting game and then he looked at me again with big blue eyes and said "poo"- he hopped off and "bingo" a big poo. We went and flushed it, washed our hands and placed our sticker on the chart. This has totally changed my views on what age kids should be toilet trained and wish I had started earlier. I know I definately will with the next one. So THANKS for the great website. All the products are great and the information really useful. It has really given me a better understanding of toilet training and also more understanding about my beautiful big boy." Catherine (mum of Finn, 17 months)

19.5MTH OLD BOY - ONE WEEK DONE - TELLING HE NEEDS TO GO
"Hi, Just wanted to say thank you for all your products and tips. We are two weeks in to potty training our 19.5 month old and it has been a great success, within 3-4 days he was wee toilet trained and within a week he was poo toilet trained. He now tells us when he is ready to go to the toilet and to our amazement has developed bladder and bowl control in this time and will hold on until we get to a toilet. We have also had dry daytime naps and some dry nights as well. Although the first 3 days were a bit like toture I am so happy we stuck with it and our now reaping the rewards. We look forward to starting even earlier with our second child due in a month. Thanks again, Melanie"

ALMOST 18MTH OLD GIRL - 10 DAYS DONE - FACEBOOK ENTRY 06/10/13
"I just wanted to post to say a huge thank you for giving me the advice and confidence to begin the toilet training journey for my almost 18mo daughter. I am actually blown away that in 10 days it is pretty much safe to say she is fully trained by day. As she wasn't showing any signs for being ready I doubted we would have any success and almost gave up, but we are now living proof that it is possible to train before 18 months. Next step, no nappies during naps and night time! We can do it! Recommending pottytraining.com.au to all my friends and will be discussing with my daughters childcare centre too!" Ruby

 

OVER TWO YEARS OLD

If your child is over two years of age and outside of the "window of opportunity", then the good news is you can still finish in days with our proven system as well.  As you can see though, prior to using our system, all of the stories below showed delay first - and often significant delay of months.  this backs up the research that late toilet training - after two years of age, takes longer with more problems.  While you can expect a two year old plus to be finished toilet training in days, the "battle of wills" often gets in the way causing problems and delay. 

If your child is over two and you haven't started, good news, you can start and end well with the Whizz & Plop Go Potty Pack and finish in days.  If your child is over two and you have started with problems and maybe even delay of many months or more, good news, you can overcome in days, just like these parents did.

2YR OLD GIRL - 4 DAYS DONE!
"I had tried several different toilet training techniques in the past with limited or no luck. After being told by a friend about this product I decided to give it a go. I watched the DVD and certain things just stood out to me. Armed with this knowledge I began the process and am so excited to report that it took only 4 days to have her fully day toilet trained. I am over the moon. Thank you for this wonderful product." Renee with Isabella

3YR OLD GIRL - 14 DAYS- OVERCAME POO PROBLEM AND NIGHT
"I just wanted to thank-you. A few weeks ago I purchased a toilet training pack. our 3 year old daughter had been partially trained for about 5 months but would not ask to go to toilet nor would she poo in toilet. I was not concerned about night training at all. Well within 2 weeks of your program she takes herself off to the toilet for both wee's and poo's (by herself) and refuses to use nappies at night (and not once wet the bed!). So I thank-you, your program has definitely worked and reduced the tension in our household." Michelle

NEARLY 3YR OLD GIRL - 4 DAYS DONE!
"Hi , I just wanted you to know how thrilled I was with your potty training kit which I purchased a few weeks ago. My nearly 3 year old daughter had a fear of sitting on the toilet/potty and was not interested in wearing undies. Within 4 days she was completely trained and is even getting through the night on occasion! I am telling everyone I know about the success I’ve had with your product so hopefully it will result in further business. Thanks again, Priscilla and Imogen"

 

Just as a side note, it took just one month for my 4mth old to become fully poo trained - every poo was on the potty or toilet, none in his nappy or pants.  He consistently stayed clean.  When you start an infant on the potty, parents seem to come back and tell me these sort of results.  Approx one month to get bowel control.  Early is good!

 

3.  How can I understand my child better?

The Whizz & Plop Go Potty Pack teaches parents how to understand their child through the "No More Nappies" Workshop on hte DVD included.  This is the key to our system's success, no matter what your child is doing, whether they are interested or not, or even refusing to go. 

If you want more information to help you become the best parent you can be then what I consider the bible of parenting is Personality Plus for Parents.   This is an excellent resource to help parents understand their children more effectively.  By understanding the different personality types, and your child’s specific emotional needs, it can totally change the dynamics and harmony of a household.  Not only that, you are able to give your child what they need most, in order to develop security and self-confidence. Toilet training can be so much more effective if you can talk your child’s language and understand the specific learning methods that work best for them.

In Personality Plus for Parents it goes through four personality types (you do the test in the back of the book to determine your child's personality... and yours and your partners):

  1. Choleric – Strong willed,  "I do it", independent, born leader, my way or no way, extrovert
  2. Sanguine – Life of the party, whirlwind child, lots of fun, loves people, loves attention, extrovert
  3. Melancholy – Thinker, cautious, genius prone, perfectionist, introvert
  4. Phlegmatic -  Laid back, easy going, usually very obliging but extremely stubborn when they don't want to do something, introvert

 

An Overview of Personality and Toilet Training

  • EASIEST CHILD TO TOILET TRAIN - The easiest personality to toilet train is the Powerful Choleric "I do it" child - once you know how to work with this child.  They can be hard if you don't know how to work with their need for control.
  • HARDEST CHILD TO TOILET TRAIN - Categorically, without a doubt, the hardest child to toilet train is the Peaceful Phlegmatic personality  - the laid back child but stubborn.  If you are still putting a nappy on the laid back child after two you are in for a long, hard ride.  You have been warned!
  • CHILDREN GUARANTEED TO GET A POO CHALLENGE - There are two personalities that you can pretty much guarantee you will have poo problems with after two years of age (though of course, not exclusively) and they are the cautious Perfect Melancholy and the laid back Peaceful Phlegmatic.  The cautious child doesn't like change so they will stick to what they know - the nappy - and the laid back child often don't care if they are wet or dirty, happy to sit in their wees and poos for hours, and are quite lazy thus very hard to motivate.

 

CHOLERIC

When it comes to toilet training, if you have a child that is a “Choleric” personality type, the strong-willed, extroverted child it is sooooooo important to know how to work with this child in order to reduce the amount of head-butting that can potentially happen.  In saying this though, this is probably the easiest personality to toilet train as they are very independent and will pretty much toilet train themselves. They tend to work things out by themselves as they believe they are always right anyway.  These children reach the "terrible twos" at 18mths they are quite advanced smiley and are usually the ones that are taking their nappy off before you are ready to go and telling you they want to use the toilet.  Love this personality!  If you know how to get around their general all-round bossy nature, you can have them done in days.

Weaknesses with Toilet Training: The choleric child will often have no problem getting onto a toilet, but they have a tendency to hold on due to their need for control.  They often don't like the out of control feeling that wees and poos bring and can hold on for hours.  When taken to extreme, this can cause UTI and constipation.

 

SANGUINE

A Sanguine child loves having loads of fun.  So, if you want them to cooperate to their full potential make it exciting.  Toilet training needs to be a grandeur event, needs to bright and colourful, needs to capture their attention and keep it, otherwise they will lose interest very quickly.  

Weaknesses with Toilet Training: The Sanguine child will often have no problems getting onto a toilet, but they don't stay there long enough to go.  Their whirlwind approach to life means their attention span is minimal so it is hard to get the consistency long enough to finish.

 

MELANCHOLY

With a Melancholy personality, they are usually the geniuses of the world, as they are constantly thinking.  They are very serious and don't like change. A Melancholy child is usually afraid of change and needs a lot of information before embarking on a new thing.  They are very cautious, and don’t like to attempt things unless they believe they can do it and do it perfectly.

Weaknesses with Toilet Training: The Melancholy child are often afraid to even sit on the toilet in the first place.  It is different.  They don't know if they can do it, so they usually won't.  They often express this with crying, screaming and refusal.

 

PHLEGMATIC

Last of all is the Phlegmatic.  The sweetest of all personality types, and the most laid back.  To toilet train a Phlegmatic you need to constantly guide them.  They need to be told what to do, or they more often than not, won’t.  Often they just couldn’t be bothered because they want to take the easy road.  They don’t like work, because it is work.  They are a compliant child and are the best at taking orders, they just may not follow through without help.  You can’t wait for this child to be “ready” for toilet training or you will be waiting a long time. 

Weaknesses with Toilet Training: The Phlegmatic child will often have no problems getting onto a toilet, in fact they can sit there for hours if you let them, they just don't finish well.   You just don't make much progress with this personality as they don't do anything.  They are hard to motivate, and often are very happy to sit in their wees and poo for hours if you let them, no problems.  You will start to see how good they are at digging their heels in if they feel pressured in any way to do something they don't want to do.  This often results in a bright and colourful tantrum.

 

Consequently, if you have a Choleric and give them orders like you need to with a Phlegmatic, then you are in for lots of trouble.  If you take an information approach with a Sanguine, don’t expect them to listen for very long, and if go over the top and colourful with a Melancholy, they will probably freak out and never try.  Know how your child ticks and you can tailor your methods to suit them and you will get the best results.

 

4.  Is it easier to toilet train an infant (under 12 months) or a toddler?

Having experienced both scenarios I would 100% recommend toilet training a baby over a toddler.  Starting Ky at 4 months has been a rewarding and exciting journey.  I didn’t think it was possible myself in the beginning, so it has been a great thrill to see that my baby can actually go to the toilet.  Starting your baby on the potty becomes such a natural, gradual process.  The common documented challenges that parents can face when toilet training an older child is avoided because your baby just doesn’t know any different.  There is no hidden agenda, there is no bad habits to break, there is no force required due to a battle of wills, there is just doing wees and poos on the potty instead of the nappy.  You are teaching your baby the right way from the beginning.  That therefore is all they know.   Subsequently, bowel control happened quickly with Ky (one month) where starting later can take a lot longer with added complications created.  “Investigations of how children fare when training starts before eighteen months suggest that many progress more rapidly than children who start later.”3. 

There are a myriad of problems associated with toilet training at a later date.  From talking with parents, every single one of the challenges listed below came up.  They were all trying to toilet train children over 2.  Some common problems include:

  • Hiding when pooing. “Some research has suggested that more than 50% of children do this at least a few times.  They may poo behind a sofa, inside a cupboard, out side in the garden or anywhere that they fell safe.”4
  • Unable to go due to the stress and pressure involved with doing something different.  “It is common for toddlers to relax and ‘let go’ as soon as they stand to walk away from the potty.”5   
  • Parent / child conflict due to a battle of wills, with an opposing mindset to yours.
  • Refusing to sit on the toilet, because of fear of something new and different, which involves change.
  • Only wanting to poo or wee in their nappy, because this is what they have always done.

Toilet training my 2.5 year old Mya, only turned positive once I started using the toilet training kit.  Before that it was a frustrating experience.  The main issue I faced was a battle of wills, but that was enough to hit a brick wall with nowhere to go. 

Toilet training Ky has been easy in comparison.  Don’t get me wrong, there is still work to be done.  It is a lot easier to not think about it and let your child go in their nappy. Especially in the beginning, it is hard to keep up with a baby if you want to keep them dry.  Ky urinated every 25 minutes.   As he has grown and developed, so has his ability to hold on and identify the need to go.  No battle of wills though, no stress or fears on his part, no pressure required, just a case of developing a new skill and the right habit from the beginning.  His response rate has been quicker than a lot of documented training times for children started after 2 years old.  As mentioned, bowel control in one month, and it took only five months to begin having dry nights.  It appears he will have the bedwetting eradicated before total daytime control, whereby full communication is required. “Kawauchi found that when parents waited to begin potty training until the late toddler years, their youngsters took about fourteen months to achieve night time dryness.  As many as 20 percent continued to wet the bed until age five, and hefty percentages continued throughout elementary school.”6   “Often, children are between three and four years of age before they are fully dry at nights.  Some children still wet the bed at six or seven, even older.”7  

If you would like some more information, an excellent resource that I used to potty train Ky is the book “Early-Start Potty Training” by Dr Linda Sonna.  Find out the full facts and then make your decision from there.  It covers all aspects from toilet training a baby to a toddler, all in the one book so you can compare the different techniques and methods required with the different age groups.

 

5.  What are the benefits of having my child out of nappies early?

Hygiene, bladder health, comfort, finances, environment, self-esteem & accomplishment, just to start with a few, and you can avoid some of the common problems associated with toilet training later! 

My sister’s twin boys were out of nappies by 18 months, and they were so proud of themselves.  Don’t underestimate the effect of accomplishment in your child’s life, even at this early age.  The opposite effect can be far worse for the untrained child, especially starting something like kindergarten with other children. This can be very stressful, especially with the added pressure of needing to be finished toilet training by a particular time.  This can really erode a child’s confidence, with key problems such as low self-esteem, social rejection and behavioural problems occurring.8 

By giving your child the ability to wear big girl/boy pants, just like Mummy and Daddy, enhances their self-esteem.  That is very rewarding knowing you are growing your child’s confidence and independence.  The result is positive all round: proud children and proud parents.

Finances can be a big factor to consider as well.  A box of nappies would not last much more than 1 week for the boys (twins) so the money saved was noticeable.  This is similar for parents with the scenario of a toddler still in nappies with a baby. 

Hygiene and comfort for your child should be another key consideration.  If we put ourselves in our child’s shoes, it must be very uncomfortable, not to mention the tell tale signs of nappy rash, etc that indicates my body is not liking this.  There is also the extra bulk between their legs while trying to walk, as well as the essence of what the nappy does – keeps their waste nice and close to their body.

 

6.  Should I use a potty or the toilet?

This is a preference thing whether to use a potty or go straight to the toilet using an insert.  There are pros and cons to both, and it is up to you and your child to decide what is best for you both.  The key considerations whether you use a potty or toilet are:

  1. Age:  I started with a potty with my 4 month old and went straight to the toilet for my 2.5 year old. 
  2. Personality: If you have a Melancholy child that doesn't like change, head straight for the toilet.  One less change in their life that will throw them with another transition later on.
  3. Your Game Plan: If you can't stand the thought of potty clean out, you will head for the toilet sooner.  The sooner you get to the toilet, the easier it is for you to leave the home, go to Nannas, Daycare, it is all toilet orientated.

Mya was big enough and old enough by that stage to be fairly independent using the toilet and I did not see the point in double handling a potty, both for convenience and hygiene.  If your child is comfortable on the toilet from the beginning, then this eliminates one extra step in training your child first on the potty and then needing to make the transition to the toilet.  This also helps when your child needs to go to the toilet outside the home.  Becoming familiar with using a toilet from the beginning makes using a public toilet all that more easier.  So the sooner you get to the toilet, the easier it is to leave the home, go to Nannas, day care, it is all toilet orientated.

If your child shows concern with using a toilet because of fear, height, comfort, etc, then of course use a potty.  Your child must be comfortable with the method used or it could result in uncooperative behaviour.  You can combat this though with using a Lupi Lu with a stool.  They are simply the best option for you and your child.  The Lupi Lu has a child and adult seat in one.

If you find your child has problems with bowel movements, and may be constipated, then a potty may be necessary so they can adequately push with their feet to help with the bowel movement.    A footrest is recommended if using a toilet to support your child’s legs and provide the support required for pushing.  Double up your stools if they are not tall enough for your child to rest their feet on.10

I recommend using a potty for babies due to their size.  Ky definitely felt more comfortable and secure on the potty as opposed to being perched so high off the ground on a toilet.  If we used a public toilet then I had to place him on backwards resting against my chest, as he seemed to feel more secure this way.  If I tried to place him facing forwards he would object and push himself off the seat.  He can sit without support on a potty as well, helping with his independence.  Now that he is 10 months I have started introducing the toilet purely to make him familiar with it and to help with public outings if I can’t always take the potty.  He is now very comfortable sitting on the toilet using a toilet insert, but my preference is still the potty at this age.  Decide what works best for you and your child.

 

7.  Do you recommend using nappies and pull-ups when toilet training?

If you are serious with toilet training your child and want to go as quickly and effectively as possible, you need to lose the nappy – at least during waking hours.  “Disposable diapers are not a good choice for potty training because they eliminate the sensation of wetness, which slows learning.”11   And yes, I’m afraid pull-ups are nappies trying to disguise themselves as underpants, but they are still nappies after all, with the same effect.  By all means, if you want to go the most expensive method, use the pull-ups at night time until you are ready to tackle the night time challenge with just underpants, but not if you are actually wanting to toilet train your child.  I personally would switch to a modern cloth nappy so they still feel wet but it is waterproof.  YOU SIMPLY CANNOT TOILET TRAIN SUCCESSFULLY WITH PULL UPS OR A NAPPY.  They do provide a sense of being a big girl or boy because they appear different to nappies, but children aren’t silly.  They still have that bulky, nappy feel between their legs, and because they take away the wetness, they have a detrimental effect on the toilet training process.  You want your child to be able to identify with this.

If you still aren’t ready to ditch the nappy altogether, at least use a cloth nappy so your child can still identify with the wet sensation.  There are some great designs available today that are modern and pin free.

I put Ky in training pants during waking hours and a CLOTH nappy when he sleeps.  For babies where they urinate quite frequently, use pilchers (protective plastic layer to contain wetness) to help avoid too many messes.

 

8.  Do I sit or stand my boy?

I am a firm believer as a parent of making life easier by doing the correct habit from the beginning.  This is true for toilet training boys.  Start with the end result in mind and teach your boy to wee standing up.  The bonus with this is boys are EASIER  to toilet train than girls if you use the right tools, specifically the Super Weeman to start with.   Yes, I know, everywhere else says boys are harder and our Bullet Proof Boy Pack is our number one seller out of every product on our online store.  It outsells the Girls Just Want To Have Fun Pack by more than double, which sort of indicates that parents are struggling with boys.  But once you use the right tools, they are easier.

The Super Weeman is the solution.  Wee wees like Daddy!  I wouldn't try standing a boy without this tool, but with the Weeman, you can demonstrate in real time.  Boys want to be just like their Daddy, plus they are doing/action creatures.  Tell a boy what to do you are not going to get the same response as showing.  This is where the Weeman comes in.  Daddy wees in it first to show (give a man a challenge wink) and then your son copies.  Then Daddy can wee in the toilet with your son weeing next to him in real time.  Big boy like Daddy now!  PLUS, the absolute extra bonus is the Toilet Yum Yums, spin around when you hit them with your wees!  Need I say more.  Boys and their toys simply cannot resist.  They will be racing to go.  The Weeman is included in the Bullet Proof Boy Pack along with the essential Go Potty Pack Dumpy and My First Reward Chart and Wee Target - hit the spot make a car, flush goes back to the black spot.  You use the Wee Target once your boy is tall enough to reach to transition to the big toilet.

 


 

 

9.  Can I get these products through my Daycare Centre?

YES! – in the local Brisbane / Gold Coast area and they are cheaper through your Daycare Centre as well.  You can organise a FREE “No More Nappies” Workshop through your local Daycare Centre and receive a free gift to help you with toilet training in the process.  Plus, you get great discount prices on all our products through the workshop as well as a prize to win on the night.  It is free and win/win for everyone, both the staff and the parents with the main winner being your child.  Phone the office on 1300 886 234 or go to our Help Centre to Book a Free Workshop.

 

10. Do you have any guarantees with your training system?

Absolutely!  We believe in our system to toilet train that emphatically there are 10 Guarantees we stand by.

This ultimate Whizz & Plop success system is GUARANTEED to:
1. Toilet train your child or your money back.
2. Give you full phone support included in the price.
3. Teach you what to do to avoid bad habits or mistakes.
4. Give you a better understanding of your child and how to work with them.
5. Shorten the toilet training process - often to just days.
6. Give you the BEST method to start well.
7. Overcome existing problems like the poo challenge / fear / refusal / inconsistency.
8. Give you the best tools and method to start and finish toilet training a toddler early - before two years old.
9. Make toilet training fun for your child.
10. Make toilet training simple and consistent.

 

COMMON TOILET TRAINING CHALLENGES

 

1. My child only wees on the toilet, but refuses to poo.  She only wants to poo in her nappy and often runs away and hides.  Why is this happening and what can I do? 

“One of the most common and frustrating toilet training roadblocks is when a child willingly pees on the potty but demands a diaper, or uses his pants, for bowel movements.  Some children will actually hold their bowel movements and create severe constipation, which further complicates the issue.”9

Although this is common problem for parents, you may feel like you are the only one going through it at the time.  There are a variety of reasons that can cause this to happen, and can often be the result of the bad habit established from pooing in a nappy for two or more years.  This can cause things like:

  • Only comfortable with the habit of pooing in a nappy and having the sensation of the poo squashed against their skin
  • Not use to sitting down to poo as they have always done it standing up
  • Believing the poo is part of them and they don’t want it flushed away.
  • Constipation and the pain caused from this
  • A past incident on the toilet that caused fear eg. water splashing up on their skin. 9

If constipation wasn’t initially the cause, it often becomes the end result as your child is holding on to their poo to avoid the toilet.  Subsequently, the first step is to treat the constipation.  Lots of fresh fruit and vegetables and fibre rich foods is important, along with copious amounts of filtered water.  See your doctor for any constipation issues you may be worried about and they may recommend more immediate action with constipation medicine.  Natural laxatives such as pear juice can be a great alternative.

Once the constipation is under control, then you can start addressing some techniques to help curb these bad habits.  If your child demands a nappy on to poo, then you can start by encouraging them to sit on the potty with the nappy on, and when they reach that milestone, then you could try cutting a hole in the nappy and get them to sit on the toilet this way.  The essence is to help your child relax so that the sphincter muscles can also relax so your child can go.

This is where it is so important to know how to work with you child to overcome.  Our POO PACK is a great solution for parents to know how to do this and make it fun for their child at the same time.

 

2. My child was fully toilet trained but is now wetting his pants again. Why is this happening and what can I do about it?

It is not uncommon for a child to revert back to wetting themselves after being dry for a while.  Toilet training is more of a process rather than a one-off event.  Once your child first started walking proficiently, I am sure you didn’t have the expectation that they would never fall down again.  The same goes for toilet training, but there are usually some tell-tale reasons why this is happening.  Major changes in your child’s life can often cause a reversal in toilet training.  This could be things like:

  • Starting a new childcare / school
  • Divorce
  • New Baby
  • Moving House
  • Moving State / Country
  • Death in the Family

Also look at whether any events in your life might be changing the amount of time you are spending with your child or how you are currently responding to your child’s needs physically and emotionally. Eg. New job, longer hours.   As mentioned earlier, by knowing your child’s personality and love language this will give greater insight as to what may be going on in their mind.   For example, if your child’s love language is “Quality Time” and you are spending less time with them due to work, then this could have more of an adverse effect then say moving house.  By knowing the source of the problem then you can begin to fix it.

It is amazing how something simple like TV can be a cause of toileting accidents.  Your child can become too absorbed in watching their favourite show and simply forget or become lazy and not want to move away. 

With any situation where your child reverts back to soiling their pants, the best thing to do is go back to the basics.  Do what you did in the beginning when you started on your toilet training journey.  Use what worked before and repeat it again.  Start implementing stickers or rewards to emphasise successes.  Be astute in knowing your child’s routine and make sure they go regularly.  Use the Whizz & Plop Go Potty Pack to help you get back on track.

 

3.  My child is refusing to go to the toilet, how can I encourage her to go?

Often when you start toilet training your child, you need to first break the old habit of going in their nappy before you can even think about starting a new one.  One challenge with your child going to the toilet in their nappy for 2 years or so of their life is the loss of wetness sensation that a disposable nappy creates.  Subsequently, your child needs to first identify what muscles to use and the actual sensation created when you need to go to the toilet. 

Subsequently, a child’s refusal to go to the toilet can be based on a number of factors:

  • They just don’t know they need to go
  • Fear of the unknown
  • Fear of change
  • Too comfortable in the old habit

The essence of toilet training your child is to get them to the toilet before they have an accident, so they can practice the correct way.  This needs to happen often enough until they can identify the sensation of needing to go themselves.  What you are creating is the desired habit formed through the right repetition.  

Children respond well to fun.  You need to give them a reason to want to do this new activity.  Every human being is the same; you need to answer the question for them “What’s in it for me?”  In order to encourage your child to go, you can do things like:

  • Use a tool like our Whizz & Plop Go Potty Packs to give you and your child something fun to focus on other than going to the toilet.  The versatile product and system can then be changed to suit your child’s personality and needs.    
  • For boys, products like the Weeman and Wee Targets again give your child something fun to focus on outside of just using the toilet.  These types of products often encourage children to go as well due to their uniqueness.  The Bullet-Proof Boy Pack works extremely well for toilet train boys and contains both of these essential products for boys plus the day and night training.
  • There are children’s books available to help explain the process to your child to reduce the fear involved and introduce your child to the new method you are trying to achieve.  This product would work well in particular for the information focussed child.

 

4.  My child keeps stopping and starting. Sometimes he will go on the toilet and then he will have accidents or refuse to go.  How can I keep him going consistently?

Consistency is the key to creating the habit.  Having a child stop and start can cause frustrations for both the child and the parent, and can delay the toilet training process for months.  As a parent you need to have an overall game plan for tackling toilet training worked out before you start, so that the process flows as smoothly as possible. 

The Whizz & Plop Go Potty Packs help with this key challenge parents face, by providing a system that creates consistency with your child as they are focused on the stickers and prize box rather than the actual task of going to the toilet.  Parents also have a system that provides a beginning, middle and end, so they know what they need to do in order to help their child develop the habit.

By applying similar techniques described in Question 3. this can help avoid or reduce inconsistency as well.

 

5.  How do I get my child to tell me she needs to go to the toilet before she has an accident?

Often your child will not even know they need to go to the toilet due to years of going to the toilet in their nappy, which takes the sensation away.  To teach your child to identify the sensation and the correct muscles required to go to the toilet, involves getting them to the toilet successfully, often enough, so they can start to realise their body’s signals.  By taking your child to the toilet before they need to go, you are showing them the correct habit they need to learn.  Through repetition, they will eventually be able to identify the necessary sensation required to take themselves to the toilet.  Whether you child is 4 months, 14 months or 24 months or older, the same principle applies, you need to first teach them what to do.

 

6.  My child has been toilet trained during the day for a year now but is still wetting the bed at nights.  What do you recommend for bedwetting?

“Potty training is about daytime toilet habits.  Nighttime dryness is a totally separate subject.” 12

In her book, Elizabeth Pantley then follows with the quote “Toilet training is accomplished when a child uses a potty chair or toilet for bladder and bowel functions during waking hours.”  Barton D. Schmitt, M.D.  Contemporary Pediatrics, 2004

Bedwetting can be a real challenge for parents: broken sleep, extra washing, worried for their child and so forth.  Because of this, it is so important to guard your reactions toward your child.  Lack of sleep at 2am in the morning can bring about bad attitudes and it is vitally important that you don’t say what you are feeling at this point.  You need to put yourself in your child’s shoes.  Noone wants to be wet and cold with broken sleep.  Your child doesn’t want it either, so punishing them for something out of their control is insensitive and cruel, and can create all sorts of psychological problems.  You need to be sensitive to your child’s feelings so as not to add to the problem and create any further stress or anxiety for your child.

Bedwetting is a common challenge that most children grow out of eventually.  “Because almost half of all three year olds and up to 40 percent of four year olds wet the bed several times a week, it is considered normal behaviour at these ages.  Additionally, 20 to 25 percent of five year olds and 10 to 15 percent of six year olds don’t stay dry every night.”13

“Even after staying dry at night for six months, about 25 percent of children regress at some point and go through a phase of wetting the bed.”14

“Bedwetting is also hereditary, so if one or both parents were bed wetters, a child has about an 80 percent chance of doing the same.”15

Subsequently, I hope these facts can help parents going through the bedwetting phase know that their child is normal and there is an end in sight.  In saying this, there are ways to help reduce the stress factor for yourself and your child, as well as, helping the situation if motivation is a key reason for the bedwetting. 

Make sure you completely drain the bladder before going to bed. Twice if possible, before books and after books for example to totally drain the bladder.  A night light made the biggest difference for my child.  Your child needs to feel safe getting up in the middle of the night if they need to.  Let them know you are there for them if they want help.  Sometimes waking your child in the middle of the night can help avoid a wet bed though this doesn’t solve the challenge of your child becoming aware themselves that they need to go.  Certain personalities don’t respond well to be woken either.   Using our My First Reward Chart to help motivate them and give them a reason to get up and go.

You can also use products such as Bed pads to help reduce the work load with washing sheets.  This product goes on top of the sheets and draws moisture away from your child without wetting the sheets.  If possible, when you are ready, use underpants versus a nappy or pull-ups.  The quicker your child can detect the wetness, the quicker they can stop.  If they are never aware they are even wetting themselves because the nappy is taking the sensation away, then it can take a lot longer to effect dryness.

If you are worried about your child, see a doctor.   “According to the National Kidney foundation, you only need to talk to a doctor about bed-wetting if your child is six to seven years of age or older or if there are other symptoms of a sleep disorder (such as restless sleep or snoring).”16

 

REFERENCES

  1. www.cyh.com.au: Parenting and Child Health – Health Topics – Toilet Training.
  2. Sonna, Dr Linda, Early-Start Potty Training (Sydney: McGraw Hill, 2005), p.32.  
  3. Sonna, Dr Linda, Early-Start Potty Training (Sydney: McGraw Hill, 2005), p.109
  4. www.cyh.com.au: Parenting and Child Health – Health Topics – Toilet Training.
  5. www.cyh.com.au: Parenting and Child Health – Health Topics – Toilet Training.
  6. Sonna, Dr Linda, Early-Start Potty Training (Sydney: McGraw Hill, 2005), p.45
  7. www.raisingchildren.net.au; Articles – Toilet Training.
  8. Sonna, Dr Linda, Early-Start Potty Training (Sydney: McGraw Hill, 2005), p.29
  9. Pantley, Elizabeth, The No-Cry Potty Training Solution (Sydney: McGraw-Hill, 2007), p.112.
  10. Pantley, Elizabeth, The No-Cry Potty Training Solution (Sydney: McGraw-Hill, 2007), p.55.
  11. Sonna, Dr Linda, Early-Start Potty Training (Sydney: McGraw Hill, 2005), p.50
  12. Pantley, Elizabeth, The No-Cry Potty Training Solution (Sydney: McGraw-Hill, 2007), p.97.
  13. Pantley, Elizabeth, The No-Cry Potty Training Solution (Sydney: McGraw-Hill, 2007), p.98.
  14. Sonna, Dr Linda, Early-Start Potty Training (Sydney: McGraw Hill, 2005), p.155
  15. Pantley, Elizabeth, The No-Cry Potty Training Solution (Sydney: McGraw-Hill, 2007), p.99.
  16. Pantley, Elizabeth, The No-Cry Potty Training Solution (Sydney: McGraw-Hill, 2007), p.103